Your Afternoon Man: Rami Malek


I’ve got a present for those of you who are… what are his fans calling themselves, do we think? Let’s see… Malikes? No. Rami Noodles. That’s clearly it. I think I’ve done my worst possible work there, don’t you? Anyway, this is for all you lovers out there. (Cue “Earth Angel,” and if you don’t know the movie reference, please hop in a DeLorean and speed back to 1985 and get thee to a cineplex.)

Rami Malek

Rami is never boring. I enjoy his kicky taste in shirts in particular, and while the shoes look a little wonkus with this — somehow light shoe plus dark suit make his feet look larger than I would have expected? — I am on the whole pleased to see a young gent in Hollywood treating an event as sartorially seriously as his female co-invitees usually do. He does not phone it in, for which I’m grateful. I’m not as thankful for Mr. Robot itself, which I can’t seem to escape, because the husband watches and it permeates my consciousness while I’m working on the couch next to him. I just… I didn’t like it, then I was bored by it, then I really didn’t like it, and THEN the ongoing critical raves seemed to mystifying to me that I think my distaste fed on them in reverse and it all escalated into Blood-Boiling Ugh. So I find Rami’s wardrobe to be a soothing antidote to all that. Mr. Robot fans, how are you digging season two? Warning: Spoilers may ensue for all episodes that have already aired in the U.S.

[Photo: Getty]

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Fug or Fab: Priyanka Chopra in BCBG MaxAzria


fug-or-fab

I admit, when I got an email early this morning informing me that Priyanka Chopra wore a “lace trimmed romper” to this premiere, the cold and icy hand of terror snaked into my chest to grasp my heart. “Oh no, Priyanka,” I said to my phone as I laid in bed and read my emails to the dulcet tones of the leaf blower going insane outside my window. So I don’t know if this is truly Not That Bad, or just Not As Bad As Anticipated. It’s cute from the side, which is often where the romper lets a woman down:

"Hands Of Stone" U.S. Premiere

Also, do not ask me where the lace IS on this trimmed romper. You can barely even tell it IS a romper, which brings me back to my days as a Young when I would glide over to what I thought was a cute dress at Contempo, only find that it was a romper. (I wore my share of rompers in the 90s, Young Readers. Don’t think I don’t understand The Lure of The Romper. I do. Believe me. I do. I often wore mine with a kicky hat, and Docs, because it was 1994 and that’s WHAT YOUNGS DID.)

It’s downright monastic from the front:

"Hands Of Stone" U.S. Premiere - Arrivals

A far cry from other rompers, which have a tendency to be more Monistat-ic. I may be able to live with this one.

[Photos: Getty Images]

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Fug or Fab: Condola Rashad in Novis


fug-or-fab

Condola is just ridiculously arresting. Well, not ridiculous; her mother is, after all, Clair Huxtable. And as much as The Cosby Show is now a very different, difficult memory, you still can’t deny that Clair was awesome: tough, smart, funny, and gorgeous, without the now-tired trope of also being messy and neurotic, all of which was  big example to set in the ’80s. (As it is now. There is nothing wrong with being messy and neurotic — aren’t we all, a little? — but too often TV shows and movies present it as a surprise that a woman can be those things and still be accomplished, or that those qualities somehow diminish her human usefulness and/or professional achievements.) Also, Clair could STARE YOU DOWN. I think Condola got a lot of that from Phylicia.

Condola Rashad

I wish she had gotten a better dress in the bargain. I actually think that overlay is quite lovely, but not only does it need lining; it could use a better piece under it. Even if you don’t mind the sheers, this seems particularly as if they are not one with each other, but genuinely just a very expensive shower curtain thrown over a tiny and tight slip. That magnificent head deserves better.

[Photo: Getty]

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What the Fug: Ciara in Michael Costello (With Special Guest Star J.Lo)


I know she supposedly sang at this party, but this feels like a LOT for a ‘do in The Hamptons.

Apollo in the Hamptons 2016: Hosted by Ronald O. Perelman

And by a lot, I also clearly mean, “very little.” I mean, if THIS is what she’s wearing to a house party, what in Bey’s name does she have planned for the VMAs? WHAT’S LEFT, CIARA?

Even J.Lo pulled it together:

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Royally Played, Wills and Kate (In LK Bennett)


A royal re-wear for the both of them today! (I mean, Wills rewears stuff all the time, obviously, but you know….who can tell one blue suit from the other?) I am delighted that the response to his taking a chance on this jacket at Wimbledon has prompted him to yank it out of the wardrobe again. As for Kate, who can forget the time she wore this to climb into an airplane without flashing anyone?

[Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty]

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Well Played: Rita Ora


well-played

Rita Ora is out and about on the daily because she’s currently filming America’s Next Top Model — she is the new host — and I keep myself entertained by trying to figure out what kind of challenge or judging event she’s headed to based on whatever she’s wearing. Whatever she’s doing for this particular episode, I hope we get a full-length shot of her dress, because the skirt is where the money is:

Rita Ora Out And About In NYC

I think this is lovely. Also: I need to tell you guys that I spent a lot of the past weekend in bed, under the weather, watching Australia’s Next Top Model on Hulu and there is nothing more annoying than having THOUGHTS about a show that’s 11 years old and is not currently on the top of anyone’s mind. But the first episode of the second season involved a near-orgy and a drunk contestant shaved off another contestant’s eyebrow while she slept and it was like no big deal! TYRA WOULD HAVE HAD THOUGHTS.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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Well Played, Mary Elizabeth Winstead in Victoria Beckham


well-played

I loooooove this dress. It is apt that it has lips all over it, because I want to kiss it:

Mary Elizabeth Winstead

If only I had a spare However Many Thousand Dollars kicking around at the bottom of my backpack to blow on a whimsical day dress. I would blow it on this one.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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